I hope that I'm making some sort of personal progress with all of these posts. I know that in my life I regress occasionally, but regression is proof of change. In case you're just joining us, here are the other posts in my emotional saga:
Resolutions
Fear of Failure
Jealousy
On to the next one: RAGE.
A conversation occurred between my husband and I, resulting in him telling me that often I don't seem "happy." This was a painful accusation, since I don't necessarily consider myself UN-happy. He pointed out that a "happy" person doesn't usually have major melt downs and tantrums as often as I do. (He wasn't being mean- I asked him for a blunt evaluation. He is exceptional at bluntness.)
Since the conversation, I've taken time to notice how often I go from 0 to 60. If you're wondering, I do it a lot. Dog has an accident on the floor? Ok, that's fine. Dog then STEPS in accident on the floor? Insta-Hulk. Seriously- it's insane.
Not only does my blood pressure suffer from these mini-rage episodes, but my poor fur babies and fur-less husband also take a beating (figuratively, of course).
Rage [n]
Resolutions
Fear of Failure
Jealousy
On to the next one: RAGE.
A conversation occurred between my husband and I, resulting in him telling me that often I don't seem "happy." This was a painful accusation, since I don't necessarily consider myself UN-happy. He pointed out that a "happy" person doesn't usually have major melt downs and tantrums as often as I do. (He wasn't being mean- I asked him for a blunt evaluation. He is exceptional at bluntness.)
Since the conversation, I've taken time to notice how often I go from 0 to 60. If you're wondering, I do it a lot. Dog has an accident on the floor? Ok, that's fine. Dog then STEPS in accident on the floor? Insta-Hulk. Seriously- it's insane.
Not only does my blood pressure suffer from these mini-rage episodes, but my poor fur babies and fur-less husband also take a beating (figuratively, of course).
Anger, unlike jealousy or an unnecessary fear, is not something I can stop feeling. God gets angry and Jesus got angry- it's natural and it's ok. Rage is NOT ok.
Because He is a just God, God is angry with sinners every
day. Surely God's anger is not wrong. It is proper, for it is even based
on His justice [Psalm 7:11]
Rage [n]
: a strong feeling of anger that is difficult to control
: a sudden expression of violent anger
There are things that I am not in control over and there are things that I AM in control over. My next emotional-goal is to move anger/temper from the "uncontrollable" category into the other- and dispose of this "rage" all together.
"In your anger do not sin": Do not
let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the
devil a foothold. He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but
must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have
something to share with those in need. Do not let any unwholesome talk
come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up
according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do
not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the
day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling
and slander, along with every form of malice. [Ephesians 4:26-31]
My dear brothers, take note of
this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to
become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life
that God desires. [James 1:19-20]
Rage is dangerous. I have taken a swing (at my best friend) out of range. When my dogs make me extremely angry I swat their noses and yell. When I stub my toe, hit my head, or cut my finger I react with tears of rage and push away anyone that tries to comfort me. My rage starts with me, but ends with someone else getting hurt.
My goal is not to shove the Bible down your throat, but when I struggle, the Bible is a strong, stable, everlasting source to turn to. Rage is a sin- a sin against love. The worst kind of sin, in my book.
Through prayer and perseverance, I can control my anger.
I can count to 10 before reacting.
I can remove myself from the situation to calm down.
I can practice yoga and meditation.
I can address my annoyances and frustration before they grow into rage.
What I can't do is ignore my behavior. For the sake of my hubby, our dogs, my friends and family, and myself, I won't ignore my tendency toward rage. Here's to being happier and in control.
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